


Let The Cards Fall Where They Will

by Angel Ascending (angel_in_ink)



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Deleted Scene, Drinking, Drunk Introspection, Gen, Making Up Tarot Cards For Fun And No Profit, Obvious symbolism is obvious, Spoilers for Episode 27 of Campaign 2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-23
Updated: 2018-07-23
Packaged: 2019-06-15 04:46:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15405288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angel_in_ink/pseuds/Angel%20Ascending
Summary: “You’d love it here,” Beau said. It wasn’t like she thought Molly could actually hear her, wherever he was. Of course not, but she was drunk and she had no one else to talk to except herself. “The place even smells like you. Well, the lavender part, not the weird incense part.”





	Let The Cards Fall Where They Will

**Author's Note:**

> What I like to think Beau got up to *after* indulging in some much needed companionship. Well, *one* of the things Beau got up to anyway.
> 
> Companion piece to one of my previous fics, [In The Cards.](http://archiveofourown.org/works/14445840)

Beau stumbled a little on her way back to her bed, bits of her freshly washed, wearing the clothes she slept in when she wasn’t on the road. She flopped onto the bed with a grin and a satisfied wince as the nail marks on her back stung pleasantly. Gods, she hadn’t had sex like that since, hells, how long had it been? Months? The closest she had come to her current feeling of utter relaxation had been after the beating Expositor Darion had given her, back in Trostenwald. A fight against a powerful woman like that, someone who could challenge Beau, put her in her place? That had practically been sex in everything but name.

“Could use a cigarette,” Beau said out loud, staring up at the ceiling. Smoking was not a vice Beau indulged herself in very often, but she had promised herself that tonight she would partake in all the vices she wanted to, within reason. Molly had never been ashamed to indulge himself, whether it had been food or drinks or companionship, maybe he had been on to something, taking joy wherever he could find it. Yes three of her friends were captured, and one of them was dead, but for a few hours she wanted to think about that as little as possible. Maybe that was selfish of her or maybe that was sane, she wasn’t sure.

“You’d love it here,” Beau said. It wasn’t like she thought Molly could actually hear her, wherever he was. Of course not, but she was drunk and she had no one else to talk to except herself. “The place even smells like you. Well, the lavender part, not the weird incense part.” She rolled onto her stomach and maybe that hadn’t been the best idea, because the room spun just a little bit when she did that. She waited for her stomach to settle and her head to stop spinning as she weighed her options. She could finish off the bottle of wine on the nightstand and pass out for the evening, or go knock on Keg’s door and see if the dwarf had a cigarette, or maybe just go to sleep, though that last option was the boring, most sensible one.

“What would you do?” Beau asked the empty room. “Hey, I know!” She reached under the bed for her pack, then rummaged through it until she found what she was looking for, a small, surprisingly plain silk bag that contained Molly’s cards. Sitting up against the headboard, she pulled the deck from the bag.

“I hope you don’t mind that I took these, or your sword, or your gold. I’ll give you the first two back, I swear. We’ve kind of been spending the gold though. Didn’t think you’d have minded, considering what we’re spending it on.” She started shuffling the cards, a little clumsily due to the fact that well, she was a bit drunk, and the cards were larger than playing cards, which she could shuffle with ease, drunk or sober.

“You gave me a reading once,” Beau said, face turned towards the ceiling. “Must have been when we were still back in Zadash. I’d been drinking and feeling shitty about something, can’t remember what it was, and I told you about that one time, with that so called fortune-teller back home. About how she said I was going to bring shame on my family and die young.” Beau laughed. “Didn’t need any sort of so called gift to know that. Just needed eyes to see the bruises and ears to hear the town gossip. Anyway, I was feeling shitty that night, and even though we had _just_ had a discussion about how I thought your cards were bullshit, you read my fortune anyway. I think you were trying to cheer me up. You told me that Yasha was interested in me. Probably didn’t need a gift to know that either.”

Beau shuffled the cards for a moment in silence. She had thought about looking through them, maybe try to give herself a reading, but now that just seemed…Wrong? Stupid? She didn’t even know what any of the cards were supposed to _mean._ Still, the shuffling gave her something to do with her hands.

“That was the kind of person you are… were… fuck. You saw I was having a bad night and tried to turn it around for me, even though we weren’t really friends, then, were we? Maybe we were. Are. Shit, I don’t know. I don’t know what I am to anyone.” She closed her eyes for a moment, her head bowed as her thoughts wandered.

“We’re going to get everyone back, I swear.” Beau’s hands clenched around the deck of cards. “We’re going to free Yasha and Jester and Fjord, and then we’re going to find Lorenzo, and I’ll be at the head of the line for the ass-kicking we’re going to give him. I hope we have time to kill him as slowly as he deserves.” She couldn’t help but remember that one last look of defiance in Molly’s eyes as he spit blood in his murder’s face. “I’m no good with swords, but I’m going to make sure your sword ends up with his blood on it. Might even manage to kill him with it, though I think Yasha is going to beat me to that. And then…”

Beau reached out with one hand and grabbed the bottle of whiskey from the nightstand, taking one hard swallow from it before she spoke again. “We’re going to get you back. I promise. Whatever we have to do. Not going to leave you behind.” Her words were delivered softly, with much feeling and only slight slurring toward the ceiling.

“I don’t know why I’m looking up,” Beau said. “I should be looking down, right? We buried you, after all.” She closed her eyes, tears burning at the corners but not falling. For a moment she could almost imagine it, the earth cold and heavy on her face, the ache in her fingers as she tried to claw her way out of the ground, dirt filling her mouth as she tried to breathe….

Beau jerked upright with a gasp, heart pounding, cards falling from her hands and spilling across the bed. Two of them landed facing upward, and she stared at them for a long moment, trying to puzzle them out. One card showed a phoenix flying upwards through a sky filled with a blaze of stars. The other depicted a blindfolded figure pierced with several arrows holding a pair of swords, the blades red with blood. Red strings were tied around the figure’s wrists and arms, holding them suspended. Despite the figure’s obviously grievous wounds, they were smiling, and Beau couldn’t help but think that the smile looked familiar.

“Molly?” Beau whispered. “I swear to the gods, if you’re haunting me right now—“

Only silence followed Beau’s vague threat, and the longer the silence stretched, the more foolish and lonely Beau felt. She swiped at her tears and gathered up Molly’s cards with shaking hands, putting them back into their bag and then into her pack before getting to her feet with a groan. She’d go knock on Keg’s door and see if she could get the dwarf to part with one of her cigarettes, maybe invite her back to her room for a drink. Anything to chase away the loneliness that clung to her like dirt from a grave.

**Author's Note:**

> For anyone who's read True North, yes, that *is* Molly's card, Destiny's Warrior. And a phoenix, hopefully foreshadowing the events I want to come to pass. Because yeah, I'm excited for whatever character Tal has in store for us, but that does not make me miss Molly any less.
> 
> I'm angel-ascending over on Tumblr if y'all want to stop by and say hi.


End file.
